Posts Tagged ‘tennis’

3rd Law Part 38 – tennis balls and chocolate coloured paint

Sunday, June 9th, 2013

The sun is doing its level best to peek through the clouds. Struggling mind you. I have a warm cup of tea in my hand which helps to warm one hand up but we all know what happens to warm cups of tea where the 3rd Law is concerned. It will be cold very soon. I might make another.

I do have to pop out this afternoon to buy the milk that I forgot to buy when I popped out this morning to buy milk. Came back with lots of good stuff for tea but no milk. Also I want to buy a job lot of cheap tennis balls. We have been playing cricket in the back garden and have lost every single ball in the house. Used to have loads of them. We still have real cricket balls but there is no way we are going to use them in the back garden. Recipe for disaster.

I did buy the kids 5 real cricket balls. Very handy for when we go to the nets. We lost one within 5 minutes of using them. Didn’t fancy looking in amongst the nettles when we were only wearing shorts. We quite like going down the nets. I throw a few balls down. No bowling. I’m rubbish at bowling. Throwing from close range is far more accurate and a test for the batsman. Then after a sensible amount of time we go and sit in front of the clubhouse and watch the game in the middle. It’s good when we win though tbh it almost doesn’t matter. The good bit is just sitting there taking in the relatively slow pace of the game. V relaxing.

There are occasions when someone brings sandwiches around together with other left overs from the players’ tea. We have been known to fill up on the sandwiches, pork pies and cakes before heading home for our own meal. I used to take the kids to the ground in the winter. Both rugby and cricket were played there so there was all year round sport.

The deal with the kids was that they could have anything they liked, within reason, provided I was allowed to have a few undisturbed beers with my pals. It’s an ideal place for the kids to run wild with lots of other kids there and no doubt one or two more responsible parents keeping an eye on them. Chocolate was off the menu but crisps, peanuts and fizzy drinks were allowed. The problem with this arrangement was that they never had much of an appetite when they got home and their mother would wonder why they didn’t each much of their evening meal. It’s all part of growing up!

When I used to play rugby the combination of 80 minutes of effort on the pitch together with a few sherberts usually resulted in me falling asleep on the settee after we had finished our meal. There were a few knock on effects of this. First of all we soon stopped asking people around for dinner on Saturday nights and in turn stopped being asked. This is because I would always fall asleep. It was probably embarrassing for Anne but there was nothing that could be done about it other than not play rugby. It would be perfectly ok if dinner was with someone else who played rugby because both males would fall asleep. It wasn’t just me. It is standard practice in the rugby fraternity.

There was one occasion where I was about to nod off and Anne insisted that I helped her chose the paint colour for the front room before I did so. I argued that the reason that I didn’t contribute to  these decisions was because Anne always ignored my suggestions and ended up choosing what she had originally wanted in the first place. Ergo no point in me thinking about it. I was ok with this situation. I didn’t really care how the house was decorated anyway.

On this occasion she persevered and I chose a yukky chocolatey brown, just to make a point. “That’s fine, we’ll have that” she said. At this point I admonished her as I had just chosen the most horrible colour I could find. Turns out it wasn’t chocolatey brown but terracotta which apparently was all the rage at that time. Hmm. I turned over and went to sleep.

The following weekend I got home from the match, ate dinner and, you know by now, went to sleep. I woke up a couple of hours later to find that Anne had gone and painted the front room whilst I slept. The verdict? A horrible chocolatey brown. It didn’t look good but fortunately the next day when the paint had dried it looked ok. Men huh?! Women Huh?!

It would be reasonable to think that after my rugby playing days were over the falling asleep on the settee by 8pm became a thing of the past. Unfortunately instead of playing rugby I would go and watch it. This had the side effect of me being in the bar by half time and therefore starting on the beer much earlier than had been the case. Although I didn’t have the same on pitch exertion to tire me out its replacement with several additional beers ended up with the same result.

Nowadays if we are off out on a Saturday night early doors beers need to be avoided. You know it makes sense.

Back to the present there is a boy mowing the lawn for a quid which apparently includes laying out the cricket square. I need to pop out to get some tennis balls. Ciao baby.

3rd Law Part 37 here

3rd Law Part 39 here