Archive for June, 2009

Tip on how to keep jury service to a minimum

Wednesday, June 10th, 2009

When I was small my dad had to do jury service in the village of Dolgellau in North Wales. The last case on the Friday was a small time poacher who everyone on the jury knew and who they all knew was almost certainly guilty.

The judge informed the jury that if he was found guilty then they would have to all return the next day, Saturday, for sentencing (we are talking 45 years ago here).

Dad was refereeing a school rugby match the next day, someone else had a hairdressers appointment etc etc.

Funnily enough the decision was “not guilty”.

If you don’t want the jury service to go on longer than necessary…

Single parent Saturday or Anne is away

Monday, June 8th, 2009

8.00 take tom to kayaking 8.40 take hannah to help out with baby ballet 11.15 pick hannah up from ballet – go to newark to pick up car left after beer festival 13.00 take john to tennis lesson 14.00 pick john up from tennis 14.15 take hannah to dance class 16.00 pick tom up from kayaking 17.00 pick hannah up from dancing 18.00 take tom to party in Normanby by Spital 19.00 take hannah 2 babysit drink wine

British summer

Sunday, June 7th, 2009

The strong summer breeze cracks the flags on the two flagpoles above the cricket pavilion. It is cold as we wait for the others to turn up. The building is locked and there are few people around. This is real summer weather as opposed to the artist’s impression.

Later the rain comes and the wind drops. A vertical soaking in prospect. A downpour of the sort that characterises the typical British summer. It is still cold but out and about and dressed in shorts and waterproof coats we stand underneath the large umbrella being fairly relaxed. We buy two bunches of asparagus fresh cut this morning before the weather hit.

At 4pm the boys arrive and we head for the Morning Star for a luxurious late afternoon beer. The pub is surprisingly full of refugees from the rain. One rare hour of liquid hedonism.

The noise on the conservatory roof is deafening and we have abandoned our ambitions to have a barbecue. We cook on the stove in the kitchen and move into the conservatory to eat. The children are a credit and impress our visitors. We should have dinner guests more often.

Later still the cacophony of birds in the back garden is loud enough to compete with any of the noises we have heard today. Mostly blackbirds I think and I wonder if I am hearing this year’s brood.

Finally, sometime towards the end of the day, the heavy, random drips of the water from the trees onto the glass roof. I recline on the sofa pondering the days climatics.

Through the Office Window III

Thursday, June 4th, 2009

There are eight lovely little blackbirds enjoying themselves in the sun on my small patch of meadow. It’s a very safe place for them. No one goes out there, and the landscape contractors are not due back for a while. They fly off every now and then towards the trees in the car park. They’re great, big trees; eleven of them, in a strip of grass left untarmacked. Someone once told me that the trees represent the eleven players of a cricket team, and that at one time the factory car park was the first cricket pitch in Wales. I think that’ll be a factory myth. A cursory google proves nothing. Looking through the trees I can see there’s not much activity across the road in the SPAR distribution centre; it’s all quiet. It’s quiet here too as most people have been bussed up to London for a company Barbeque to celebrate its centenary. So I’m having a quiet afternoon watching life go by outside. And I was right about the buttercups, they’re all starting to emerge again.

Through the Office Window II

Monday, June 1st, 2009

It’s a beautiful, still, sunny day outside. The hot air is trying to move the branches of the trees, but without much success. It’s the sort of day that when you’re indoors you want to be outside in the sun, and when you’re outside, you want to be indoors because it’s too hot.

The landscape contractors are back, and have obligingly parked their white van by the ‘Contractors Parking’ sign. There’s a man driving a lawn mower around my patch of meadow. He’s sporting a yellow, sleeve-less, high-viz top. I feel like asking him whether he’s got any suntan lotion on. We used to make it here, and there’s plenty in the staff shop. But I won’t disturb him. He doesn’t look particularly friendly. The daisies and the buttercups are gone, which is a shame as I was enjoying them. But they’ll be back very soon – the irrepressible force of nature will keep the contractors in employment all summer.

There’s a growing mound of freshly-mown grass in the back of the van. There are probably thousands of landscape contractors all around the country, right now, contributing to the nation’s freshly-mown grass mountain. Where does it all go ?