where art collides philosoperontap

The wait is nearly over. Golf bag sorted. Overnight (s) bag packed. Sat in the window of the snug awaiting collection for onward carriage to Norfolk. Before heading out I checked the lake cam and cctv. Fox spotted in front drive during the night (11:26) and at 04:41 the pair of muntjac deer reappeared in the garden. They haven’t been seen in a while. It does concern me what might happen to the youngster if the fox happened by at the same time. They use the same bit of hedge for entry and exit.

Forgot to mention it the other day, what with all the hullabaloo with the fox, but Brian mentioned that he saw a submarine in the lake. Only the periscope mind you but when it comes to things in lakes Brian knows his stuff. After all, he spends all his time there. Brian is a man of few words and for him to come out with such a statement should be considered significant. Moreover as a straight talking gnome of integrity his remark has to be taken seriously.

Now there is a scenario where it wasn’t a submarine and Bri was mistaken but I’ve racked my brains to try and come up with anything that might look like a periscope but is something else and I’ve drawn a blank. I suppose it could just have been someone snorkelling but in that case Brian would have seen a body attached to the “periscope”, surely? Doesn’t sound right does it? The lake is deep enough for a sub. In parts it is as deep as Loch Ness which, as you know, is big enough to hide a monster. I’m sticking with sub.

It’s going to be interesting to get Brian’s insights into lake related matters. His gnome’s eye view will nicely complement the evidence of the lake cam. Enhance it even. For example the lake cam doesn’t capture weather conditions. Wind whipping up white tops on the water. Storms a brewing. I draw the line at tsunamis. I wouldn’t expect Brian to hang around after a tsunami warning. We major on health and safety at the lake.

I recall our hotel in Ao Nang in Thailand had a tsunami warning sign right outside. On the prom. Fortunately no tsunami was forthcoming but it was somewhat sobering. We weren’t on the top floor (there were only two) which with hindsight we should have requested and we were quite near the beach. I think the presence of the sign was sufficient warning. At the first sign of a tsunami we would have hot tailed it to high ground. I think as I recall I did ask to move up a floor but they were fully booked so no go. There was a nice pool at that hotel, fwiw.

I might look at putting in place another lakeside sign. Tsunami warning. The issue here is proportionality. I don’t want too many man made structures around what after all is a natural feature in the landscape. Perhaps I could paint it on a rock. Maybe a bird hide would work. Discrete. Blends in. Somewhere we could sit patiently and watch birds flutter in to land. Migrating egrets or simlar. Ducks. Get the binocs out. I must bring the binocs to the shed. My Collins bird recognition book is already here, somewhere.

I did want to put a bust of Zeus on a plinth in the undergrowth surrounding the lake. I’ve been looking for a Greek statue for a while and found one in the caff at Hemswell Antiques Centre. However, for some reason THG objected. Would have been very discrete and I thought the price point of £650 (including the plinth) was very reasonable. We married men (of thirty seven years) do accept that she and I are a team and the opinion of our chosen life partner counts. It’s not as if I could sneak it in and see if she notices. “That Greek statue? Oh it’s been there for ages”. This old thing 🙂

Dunno really, what to say. THG asked what’s going in the diary today. Nobody wants to know I had granola with greek yo and berries for breakfast washed down with a cup of tea. Do they? I suppose folk might be vaguely interested in knowing it’s looking a bit drizzly out. I haven’t looked at the lake cam yet so no fox news to report. Pesky fox news. It has been mentioned that the area around the lake needs landscaping and I don’t disagree with this but care does need to be taken not to despoil the wild nature of the place. No landscaping today anyway. Drizzle.

Yesterday on my way home from a preop consultation at the hospital I dropped by American Golf in Whisby and picked up a cheap driver. I was somewhat taken aback by how much you can spend on a driver. The latest Ping was five hundred quid or more. I wouldn’t get the benefit. Mine was the cheapest they had in the shop. I only wanted a second hand one really but they ship them all off to some used golf club website for disposal. My current driver is the fifty year old Ping Eye job I played with as a kid. Was state of the art then. I could hit it a long way. On a good day 280 yards. Norranymore. I’ve only been using it because I gave my other driver to John whose need was greater than mine. We mostly only play the par 3 nine holer at Laughterton.

It’s all systems go for the next hip hop btw. 28th October. Tuesday. Mr Manktelow only works there on Tuesdays. He spreads the lurve around different hospitals. Hip lurve. If it’s Tuesday it must be the Park Hospital.

I quite like this drizzly weather. Relaxing. The time is not too far when we will light the fire. Plenty of fuel at the bottom of the garden though I do need to split some of the logs. Problem is they are like concrete. Hadn’t realised they are best split fresh. I’ll work out a way. A combination of axe and sledgehammer should do it.

Tomorrow us lads are off across the county line to Norfolk for a golf trip, hence the new driver. There is usually a big prize for the longest drive. Pound from each player so six quid on offer. Rich pickings. Same for nearest the pin, the front nine and back nine. A total of twenty four pounds up for grabs. Not sure anyone has ever made a clean sweep. That would be like winning all the majors in the same season. Aint gonna happen.