where art collides philosoperontap

April 21, 2013

Leaflets, leaflets, get yer leaflets ere

Filed under: chinks — Trefor Davies @ 11:12 am

Went out delivering leaflets for the book launch yesterday. Couple of hours of so starting down the right hand side of Lee Road then wending my way round the houses until I finished up at the Burton Road Chippy where Lesley very kindly treated me to an ice filled glass of Diet Coke.

My leaflet delivering methods are not very scientific. If I didn’t feel like delivering to a particular house I didn’t.  This would be the case, for example, if the gate was closed and it was a long walk to the front door in front of plate glass windows.

I wasn’t bothered about getting every house. I didn’t have enough leaflets for the whole of Lincoln anyway and as long as I got some out there I was happy. I only delivered to one side of Lee Road. Having to cross back and forth would not have been efficient.

Delivering the leaflets was a bit of a learning experience. It made me sympathise with postmen. Putting your letterbox at ankle height is most unfriendly. Also not all letterboxes are easy to get things through, especially those with brushes designed to keep out draughts. Trying to shove a leaflet through the letterbox of a terrace house when you know that there is someone sitting in the room just the other side of the door calls for mental strength, resolution, especially when you know they haven’t asked for the leaflet.

Quite a number of letterboxes had notes taped to them asking people not to deliver things. These ranged from “no free newspapers” to a whole list of proscribed items: “no junk mail, no menus, no charity bags, no canvassers”. My leaflet was of course a beautifully designed piece of art that no one could ever describe as junk mail but I let that house go. They didn’t seem to be the sort of people who would want to come to the book launch anyway.

I came across the occasional dog. At one house a ferocious Alsation tore the leaflet to shreds the moment I put it through the door. Wondered what the owners did to get readable mail. Maybe no one sends them letters anyway.

The terrace houses between Newport and Burton Road were conveniently close together for effective leaflet distribution. Unfortunately for the residents this was known to the local takeaway restaurants who must make a habit of spamming the area. One house specifically requested no takeaway menus.

After a couple of hours I ended up with Lesley and unfortunately the break took away my enthusiasm to deliver any more. It didn’t matter. As I said I didn’t have a specific target. Popped in to Clearview Opticians to order some more contact lenses from Annabel and set off for home.

Outside the Coop I bumped in to Andrew Walton from the office who put the idea of beer in my head. I was already  going to the rugby club for the afternoon to wath the last ever home game of Lincoln RFC at the Lindum ground. They are moving to Nettleham next season. On that basis I figured a beer at the Strugglers would be fine so I popped in there for a pint of Landlord. I also popped into the Morning Star for another so it took me a little while to get home but I figured I deserved it.

I reckon I still have around 400 leaflets left to get rid of which may or may not happen. That’s OK.  The counter on philosopherontap.com shows there are 17 days to go and I’m pretty confident of getting a good turn out for the launch.

That’s enough of an update. Ciao.

French national anthem a la philosopherontap

Filed under: fusion,music,Uncategorized — Tags: , , — Trefor Davies @ 10:12 am

Na na na naa naa naa naa naaa na na

Na naa na naa naa, naa na naaa

Na na na naa naa naa naa naaa na na

Na naa na naa naa, naa na naaa

Na na naa naa naa naa na naa naaa

Na na naa naa naa naa na naaa

Naa naaa na na na naaa

Naa naaa na na na naaa

Naa naa, naa naa, naa na na naa

Naa naa nan a na naaa.

 

Vive la republique!

 

Alternative French national anthem sung whilst on rugby tour to France

Na na na naa naa naa naa naaa na na

Na naa na naa naa, naa na naaa

Na na na naa naa naa naa naaa na na

Na naa na naa naa, naa na naaa

Na na naa naa naa naa na naa naaa

Na na naa naa naa naa na naaa

Ou est le papier?

Ou est le papier?

Naa naaa na na na naaa

Naa naa, naa naa, naa na na naa

Ou est le papier?

 

Quinze bierre encore sil vous plait

April 18, 2013

The vending machine

Filed under: collisions — Tags: , — Trefor Davies @ 8:25 pm

This is the vending machine. The ultimate collision of science and art.  But no ordinary vending machine this. It’s bottle retrieval and dispensing mechanism is a joy to behold. People have been known to spend their entire life’s savings on fizzy pop from this machine just to be able to watch it in action, over and over again. It’s the pinnacle of art, a work so mesmerising as to be addictive. The E number filled rubbish it dispenses contrasts uncomfortably with its mechanical functional elegance, beauty.  It is at once a chink, a collision, poetry in motion, thought stimulant, a travelogue and indeed if the video is set to repeat, a representation of the Third Law. It is both disturbing and fulfilling.

At this point there is nothing further to say. Please watch the video.

This video was filmed at Hamburg’s Miniatur Wunderland, the world’s biggest model railway.

duck eggs in Lincoln market

Filed under: thoughts — Tags: , , , — Trefor Davies @ 5:59 pm

Quite appropriate that they sell duck eggs in Lincoln market intit duck?

I have never, to my knowledge, eaten a duck egg.

Duck eggs are larger than those of chickens but not as big as an ostrich egg. It is logical that it should take fewer duck eggs to make an omlette.

According to Wikipedia eggs are laid by females of many different species, including birds, reptiles, amphibians, and fish.

Ducks can fly though that has nothing whatsoever to do with their eggs. I am not aware of a duck ever having to lay an egg in mid flight, perhaps to jettison some weight and regain altitude. Should such an eventuality ever occur then it could prove awkward for anyone under the flight path.

A duck egg is more likely to equate to the “free range” egg in the chicken world as they are not typically battery farmed1.

My favourite Chinese dish is crispy duck. There used to be a restaurant in Lincoln called Seelys that I particularly liked and  they used to serve duck breast in ginger sauce. Yum.

Duck down is used in continental quilts, pillows and high end sleeping bags.

The classic word used to represent duck “speak” is “quack”.

I like ducks.

The term  duck is used to represent the act of lowering one’s head to avoid being hit by an object, fixed or in motion.

Donald Duck is a Disney cartoon character. Daffy Duck on the other hand is by Warner Brothers. I prefer Daffy to Donald, sorry.

The term Donald Duck is sometimes used in Cockney rhyming slang, or at least it feels as if it should be.

There are many different types of duck. Ducks like water.

1 this is pure speculation mind you and not based on any real knowledge of the duck “manufacturing” industry.

April 17, 2013

juice-shot by KLM

Filed under: ideas,short stories,the art gallery — Tags: , , — Trefor Davies @ 9:17 pm

Ration pack issued by KLM in case the plane has to make a forced landing in the North Sea en route from Humberside Airport to Amsterdam. There are a number of scenarios when this happens.

Scenario #1

Plane lands in sea and breaks up and sinks without trace or at least long enough and deep enough to drown all the passengers before they have a chance to put on their lifejackets and slide down the emergency escape chutes which haven’t deployed in any case.

Result: Unless the passengers in question have managed to consume the rations on their way down, which does seem unlikely, the said rations remain uneaten due to the untimely demise of all concerned.

Scenario #2

Plane lands in sea but doesn’t break up. Passengers either remain on board, benefiting from the buoyant nature of the airframe or exit down the chutes and then stay afloat by treating the chutes as life rafts.

Result: Passengers scoff the snack and the drink and are probably rescued in reasonable time because it is a major air disaster and every ship in the North Sea will divert to the crash location. Some passengers may die as a result of not securing a place on the life raft but worse things happen at sea these things happen.

Scenario #3

Plane has drifted way off course and is not actually over the North Sea. Fortunately the captain has managed to find his way to a remote desert island and brings the plane down safely in the water close enough to land for the passengers to all wade ashore. Those in business class make their way to one end of the beach where they establish their own little enclave complete with business class rations that include nice little salt and pepper sets though still only plastic cutlery due to safety concerns following 9/11. The captain joins the business class passengers, ostensibly as part of the service but in reality because given the choice between their food and the c&@p dished out to everybody else he opts to look after himself. The rest of us are allowed to wander off aimlessly to look after ourselves and find shelter wherever we can off the beach.

Rations of both classes of passenger are soon consumed including those in business class and despite the reality that their food too was not particularly edible.

Result: The rest of this story follows a number of possible well trodden paths that include massacre of all concerned by the cannibal tribes of the area, slaughter of most of the survivors by internecine war or the kicking in of a survival instinct along the lines of Swiss Family Robinson whereby everyone works as a team and builds a cosy shelter from the elements that serves as home until they are all rescued by a freighter that was also well of course and was putting in at the island to refill its water tanks.

Scenario #4

There is no scenario #4. That’s it…

PS the pen is superfluous to the story. It just happened to be in the photo.

brass coathooks

Filed under: ideas,thoughts — Tags: , — Trefor Davies @ 6:15 pm

We’ve all heard the saying “freeze the balls off a brass monkey”. Well in Germany they don’t have that saying. They say “it’s cold enough for you not to want to hang your coat on the brass coathook but keep wearing it instead”.

Doesn’t quite have the same ring to it but who are we to say eh? The brass coat hook displayed in the featured image of this post is one of a pair spotted hidden discretely behind a screen in the corner of a room at the Haus der Patriotischen Gesellschaft  in Hamburg.

That’s Hamburg, Germany, not Hamburg, USA where confusingly there appears to be more than one.  Clearly in the olden days where immigration from Germany to the USA was at its peak and the wild west was filled  adventurers of  Hanseatic origin the communications systems were not good enough for people to tell their fellow immigrants that, for the purposes of avoiding duplication,  they had already named one bit of prairie Hamburg.

Now you know. Don’t worry though, spring has finally arrived, I think. Just remember ne’er cast a clout until May is out, or whatever they say in Hamburg.

Ciao baby.

April 16, 2013

Sign of the times

Filed under: fusion,the art gallery — Trefor Davies @ 10:16 pm

speaks for itself. sign of the times – a bus stop in Hamburg.

Empty orange glass on a light wood laminated background

Filed under: the art gallery — Trefor Davies @ 3:49 pm

An empty glass that previously contained orange juice on a light wood background taken by the artist whilst waiting for a plane at Hamburg airport.

Lighting was not ideal for photography and it may be seen that there is a yellowish glare on the table in front of the glass. The presence of a shadow is also an illustration that lights were used although the non-symmetrical effect does nothing to detract from the overall effect and value of the piece.

Clicking on the image will produce a larger that will permit closer examination of the imagery on the glass.

Davies took this picture on his way home from a technical forum he had attended in Hamburg. It may be seen as a classic case study of the unglamorous nature of what is often perceived to be a jet setting lifestyle.

April 15, 2013

meat

Filed under: the art gallery — Tags: — Trefor Davies @ 2:10 pm

Get yer meat ere. C’mon darlin yev nevver seen such a good deal. Feed the family fer a week. Larvley bit o steak. Pork chops, you can cook em with a bit of apple sauce. Shove in a bit o mustard. Laarvley. Fresh free range chicken. These hens were laying eggs yesterday.  Nice bit o breast or leg – whichever you prefer darlin. Treat them to a nice joint on Sunday with lotsa rich, thick gravy. Pork or beef. Sausages? You want sausages? Make em meself. Only use the best quality pork with a bit o sage. Get yer meat ere darlin, get yer meat ere.

Vots goin on ere zen?

Filed under: the art gallery — Trefor Davies @ 1:11 pm

Elo elo young feller me lad. Vot’s goin on ere zen? Vere did you get zat expensif looking jacket from? You dont vont to be vanderin around zees place ven you could be home votchin the teevee. Ze Hahmburg versus Munchen football match is on. Run along now zen sonny und don’t let me find you hanging around zis place again.

the fruit and vegetable stall

Filed under: the art gallery — Tags: , , , , — Trefor Davies @ 12:33 pm

Now then children, how many different types of fruit and vegetable can you see in this photo? See if you can count them all.

It’s a very tidily laid out stall in Lincoln market at the Cornhill isn’t it. Why don’t you make a drawing of the stall. It’s got lots of nice colours you can use to make your picture pretty.

Look at the prices. They are very good value aren’t they? Tell your mummy to buy her fruit and veg from the market. It’s much cheaper than Tesco.

smokers die younger

Filed under: ideas,the art gallery — Tags: , , , — Trefor Davies @ 10:50 am

KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL

April 14, 2013

Tango Romeo Echo Foxtrot.

Filed under: opinion — Tags: — Trefor Davies @ 11:35 am

Tango Romeo Echo Foxtrot.  That’s my handle, my call sign, the way I like to be recognised. I answer to it, everywhere I go, at home, in the street and in the farthest reaches of your imagination. It wouldn’t work any other way, no way.

Try it, say it out loud, like it is, now, go on. Sounds okay to me. I am good with that. Comfortable. Tango Romeo Echo Foxtrot, I said it again. Tango Romeo Echo Foxtrot. Ohhh kaaay.

It’s good baby. I like it. Sits easy, on my shoulders, like no other. With it I walk tall, I have vision and I can see. The clock on the wall ticks but my name stays the same. Numero uno. Yah. With me to the grave. That’s me.

Tango Romeo Echo Foxtrot Tango Romeo Echo Foxtrot Tango Romeo Echo Foxtrot Tango Romeo Echo Foxtrot.

Drinks at the Strait and Narrow in Lincoln

Filed under: the art gallery — Tags: , , , — Trefor Davies @ 11:27 am

Another in the series of shots taken of drinks behind the bar of a pub. This time it’s the Strait and Narrow on Steep Hill in Lincoln. The pub has a huge selection of beers and spirits including my fave Timothy Taylor’s Landlord.

In my mind it isn’t the best pub in town partly because it’s down the hill and partly because it is too big. A pub needs to be intimate, cosy. I guess it has its market.

On a different note when I was there last Friday evening I do believe I managed to recruit a stone masonry correspondent for Philosopherontap and have possibly also identified a railway engineering correspondent. Stay tuned…

sobering thoughts – man sleeping rough

Filed under: chinks,thoughts — Trefor Davies @ 11:11 am

I can see this man from my bedroom window on the 5th floor of the Hamburg Sofitel. This is a luxury hotel and the guy is in his sleeping bag under a covered walkway. This morning I had a very pleasant breakfast followed by a stroll to the Hamburg Wunderland Model railway exhibit where I spent a very pleasant hour and a half gazing in awe at the magnificent model railway. It looks to me as if he is sleeping during the daytime because he doesn’t seem to have stirred since when I first saw him at breakfast and now which is around 1pm.

On the one hand I’m thinking it isn’t right for him to be out sleeping rough like that when my accommodation is extremely comfortable. What can I do to help him? I already give a chunk of cash every month to charitable causes via standing order. What is the right balance? I’m not a Communist which would point to a scenario where he and I would have pretty much the same lifestyle. One of the reasons that people work hard to succeed is the rewards that accrue as a result of the hard work. In my case this weekend that reward is manifested as a few days in the luxury hotel.

Makes you think…

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